Good morning everyone.

My apologies, as I've posted this fundraiser to various platforms with an update individually, but not updated the fundraiser itself.

But, it is with perhaps the heaviest heart I've ever had, accompanied with what no doubt has been the most tears shed of my life, I'm updating you all with Blue's last night and morning with us.

On September 30th, I had my 1st overnight, 10-hour shift at my job. It took every ounce of willpower to even make myself go, but before I left, I sat down with Blue. Gently petting him, and giving him light forehead kisses, I reminded him of how much I loved him, what a good boy he always was, and told him he did not have to hold on for me. That I would understand when was gone when I got home.

But, 11.5 hours later, when I did get home, there he was. Still breathing. When he heard my voice, he struggled to lift his head and look for me. But, despite being blind now, and despite the great deal of effort expended in lifting his head, he managed to look right at me. That broke me. At some point, unfortunately, being weak and stupid, I could take no more, and went to my bedroom and sat on my bed.

Chace, however, stayed out there. And it wasn't very long before, on the morning of October 1st, he let go. There was never any indication of pain. No howl. He just closed his eyes, and stopped breathing, all the while being told he was loved and being held by his other Daddy. So, as much guilt and regret and pain that I carry for not being out there in his last moment, I am grateful that he was not alone. That he could have had no question that he was loved deeply.

He was picked up, carefully, and lovingly placed in a box we prepared for him a couple days prior. We do still have him. We have nowhere really to take him, since I will not allow him to just be surrendered coldly. I won't go into details, but for now he is somewhere sufficient for another couple of days maybe.

But now, more than ever, we need help. I feel, on my bones, that he held on as long as he did because he knew we needed him to. He held on long enough to wait for me to come home from work, and have a whole 2 days to learn how to pretend to not be a broken human being.  And he tried to give us enough time to be able to take care of him afterwards. But we are now running out of time.

Please, for Blue, anything anyone can stand to give, or for Blue, please share this to every platform you can. My little Blue prince  needs a proper place to be put to rest. Please.