My story starts on Friday May 30th 2925, It was a typical day. Working, mowing grass, cooking and taking out the trash. On that night I was planning on going to a Dress up Birthday party the next day for somebody. Me and my Son just got our costumes I bought from Amazon. That night I ended up in hospital over a Stroke I had.
It took me 3 months to recover. I ended up going to three hospitals and therapy. The first hospital I was at and I commend the staff... they took care of me very well the 2nd hospital...they took my dignity from me... not all but some of my nurses just saw me as their next paycheck and treated me like such, didn't even bathe me daily unless asked. The call button for nurses was ignored type stuff. I don't know if it was the drugs or me just trusting enough so I signed for my own mother to be my POC (point of contact). Biggest mistake in my life. Made every bad decision possible in my behalf. She had me sent to a therapy place on the other side of the state regardless my opposition to it. Even before all of this 3 or so months prior to this kept a secret to my son wanting to move to another state, instead of telling me. Where I could have talked to him or even showing him that I cared. The opportunity was taken from me. Me and my son never had an argument besides where we were going to eat. I remember the day he came out to me, I gave him the biggest hug and even told him I didn't care as long as he will be my son forever. My own mother instead of saying something to me, held this secret instead of saying something to me her own son.
While I was in the 2nd hospital my mother decided to use my car a white 2017 Alfa Romeo Guilia Ti I just bought 3 months prior. I treated that car like it was my baby... washed it as much as I could, kept up with it as best I could, I just replaced (1) tire and had an appointment to have the other (3) changed on that Saturday, I even kept it in my garage when it was not being used even did oil change just a day or so before I ended up in the hospital. I took care of my mother's car often, even offered to have my mother's own car taken care of. I found out I could apply for a Veterans fund from somebody who worked for OSHA (god bless her soul) at my time working security at an Amazon. A fund I was unaware of, I recommend this to any of my Vets out there. It took me a while close to two years. I got a decent payoff at the time. I bought a new and first home at the time. I worked at a local hospital for kids as a security guard there. Made many friends there young and old. Even made blank personalized books and stickers for the kids there.
When I was in the 2nd hospital my mother had asked if was ok to borrow my car after she had taken it from my garage and was using it as if it was her own. I asked her to replace (3) of the tires so she would not get hurt or stranded while using it and I repeated it. I said I wouldn't mind paying for it at the time I had plenty in my bank account at the time. I reminded her numerous times (ignoring the fact that it was taken out of my garage). I could not say "no" to my own mother. This was the biggest mistake I have made besides making her my POC. She had made the decision to send me across state (about 3 hours away) against my wishes to just go home at the time. She ended up getting into an accident (that could have been avoided) thank goodness she didn't end up killed. One of the tires I asked her to replace ended up blowing out on her way back home. She up getting hurt in that accident. And my car was not covered by my insurance because I was not the driver and I had full coverage. I was in the hospital and for weeks my family said nothing about it (2 brothers and 1 sister). During all of this my vehicle ended up in a salvage yard collecting daily fees. It came out to about 2K in fees which my mother ended up paying for only after I came home and asked her where is my vehicle? She expected me to pay for by the way because it was mine. It's all about the car people and family told me with you (placing the blame on me). I saw it as disrespect after all and everything that I have done for her and this family. My state does not tell you this or make it known that if your vehicle get into an accident on freeway you are responsible for the damages done to it. Did I tell you my car was taken out and I could not say or do anything about it.
During my time at therapy and God bless them. There were a few bad apples there but not as many as there were good people there. I told myself not to give up and learned to walk, speak and not lose my sanity. They did not teach me everything. I had to teach my self how to cook, tie my own shoes, shave my beard and head (because I am bald) and something as easy as dressing myself. When I finally came home, I thought everything would get better. My home was infested with roaches and ants at the time and it was disgusting. I don't blame my son for this because he did a lot for my daughter while I was in the hospital. He made sure she was fed, bathed and entertained to keep her mind off me being away. She is 15 and he just graduated from Highschool 18. All I asked was to take out the trash never asked for a dime from him. He had his own room and car I gave him. All I asked was to get himself a job to maintain his lifestyle and save for the future. My mother and her sister (my Aunt) had moved in my house while I was gone and made it into place for her therapy. I would find dishes that weren't properly washed and the trash would not be taken out daily. My home ended up being a breeding place for insects and they felt at home. If that is not disrespectful to me, I don't know what is. My mother ended up in the hospital here about a month after I got home and when I went to see her. I was told I have to say something to you. I expected an apology at the time. I ended up being apologized to about something that happened to me about 40yrs ago. I gave her months after and no apology for my son or my car was given. She knew how I felt and I gave plenty of opportunities to do so and you figured she would take one of them. Months went by and I gave up on her apologizing to me her own son. I don't have anything to say to her and at this point have no forgiveness. She is out of my life though she is my own mother. I could not look at her everyday if this is how you treat your own son, how do I expect you to treat your own grandkids. I lived with her and was just down the hallway and she could not tell me once about my own son. Now he lives a few states away with his mother and won't tell me where I went wrong or if I did. I let her talk to daughter as she is her grandmother and my daughter does not know about any this because I'm respect her.
Now comes the hard part is asking for help. I can't work all I have is my VA disability checks and I do not have the income to take care of myself and have my daughter travel.
I can't and will not drive. My car damages cost around $7000 which I'm trying to sell afterwards
the Damage to the roadways cost about $4000 and I still owe about $8000 to my bank which I have been paying off. I owe about $5000 to some family members. Travel for my daughter is going to end up going up due to gas prices. Bills are going to go up as I'm told Gas and Water. I barely scratch by monthly. I just had some teeth replaced before having my stroke which I still owe about $2000 for. I was fine before and was able to keep up, now I ask for some help.
Before this happened to me I was just getting into painting and accomplished 1. I don't have a significant other and live by myself.
