Here's my story...
My name is Tiffany. I have had a very eventful life and am hoping that I can inspire people to understand what I have been through and hopefully no one will ever go through anything remotely similar by spreading my message. I tried to take my life May 17th, 2024, because it seemed as I had no hope. I was left in terrible conditions and promised help that never came. I put a knife in my left armpit because I had felt it was the quickest and least painful way to leave the world. I instead was taken to the hospital, just to remain on Earth in pain and terrible suffering and loss. I was put on 9 anti-depressants and mood stabilizers, along with pain medicine, and spent a month in the psychiatric ward. I was not trying to become close with anyone, because my heart was empty. I lost all of my animals and any will to live before waking up in the hospital, and had no desire to talk to anyone or think about anything at all. I met my fiancé there, who was one of the first people I spoke to. He offered half his cigarette to my only friend the first time I went on a break with everyone, and I immediately thought he was one of the sweetest guys I had ever met. He in turn told me that I needed a true friend. I didn't care enough about myself to want to allow any friendship, because all I wanted to do was die. He ended up having a seizure a few days later and all I could think was "not Phil...", which made me feel terrible about anyone else it may have been. But when my friend Katie and I heard he was on his way back, we were both so excited, because neither of us thought we'd ever see him again. When he got back to the ward, I gave him a hug, then she did, then I told him I needed one more. Katie told him I cried for nearly 2 hours when he left, which I really did, I just had an instant connection with him. I didn't expect to be so close with anyone, but he was like my best friend immediately. We ate meals together, always sat with each other during breaks, and I just listened to him talk and interact with everyone. I tried my best to ignore my broken heart, but I barely held it together. When my 30 days was up at the mental ward, I asked if they could let me stay, as everyone there was like my family by that point, but I was told that they had nothing for me there anymore, and they sent me to a transitional shelter, where I did not receive the assistance I required to be able to obtain my medication. I was already in shock from being let go from my stable home, then cut off from all of that medicine, and the family that I had adapted to at the mental facility. I spent 3 days there, then the head nurse asked if I was able to handle being on my own at a facility like that, and I told her no, I had no idea how to function anymore. She called and was told I could go back to my old psychiatric hospital, and they sent me there, only to be told after filling out the paperwork and seeing some of the nurses and staff, that I wasn't allowed there, and they sent me to another facility, which was closed due to it being Juneteenth. I had to walk across the street to the nearest business and luckily had my best friend's number and called him. I was locked out of my head, meaning I couldn't talk or really function. I just held onto his arm or hand and let him lead me wherever we went. I was immediately taken to safety and was attached to his family immediately. They were so welcoming and special to me. I watched him dance with poles and blades and we walked everywhere all the time. I finally felt like I might be able to have a reason to continue living without my heart breaking nearly every moment from the loss of my past. I somehow got separated from my best friend at some point and it felt like something was keeping us from finding each other for so long. The year went past in a blur and somehow I woke up in a hospital bed after being struck by a train, exactly one year from the night I tried to end my life, May 17th, 2025, from someone drugging me and placing me on the tracks. I had 4 broken ribs on both sides, 2 cracks in my pelvis, and collapsed lungs. I spent nearly a month recovering and trying to piece together bits and pieces of information after waking up nearly a week after being hit. I was told that I was standing on the tracks and the conductor saw me 2 miles before he hit me, and he called life flight to let them know he couldn't stop and was going to hit me. I was apparently hit at 25mph, and it ruptured my spleen, so life flight gave me 2 units of whole blood to keep me alive, just for me to wake up in the hospital to find out I was fighting for my life. I was barely given any information, due to my mental status and was told that I was going to get immediate assistance from the Social Security Administration, housing, food stamps, etc. And now I'm facing homelessness and being told that we have no options to stay together, which sends me into terrible PTSD panic attacks from being away from him, and vice versa with him. I am pregnant, and still unable to even get an appointment to see how far along I am or prenatal vitamins or any assistance from the mental health hospital of Olathe, KS, that's telling us that we have to have income for them to help us with housing, and offered us a tent, knowing my medical problems and also knowing that I am now pregnant, and yet we have not seen any kind of assistance towards housing or any type of benefits. But from the time we started going there, I was told that I was going to get the assistance that we need, but steady keep getting pushed to the next set of people that want to help but have no means to help. This is why I am having to reach out to the community for some type of help or assistance. Here is my story. Please help, share, and if my story touches your heart, please keep us in your prayers and spread our message so we can get the help we so desperately need.
