My name is Evan. I'm a single father with two daughters age 11 and 8. My oldest daughter, Clara, is level 3 Autistic, Non-verbal and still in diapers. My younger daughter, Eve is a little mini-me and an angel to her sister.
5 years ago, their mother, an attorney, initiated Divorce proceedings and demanded I leave the house owned by her family. She was the breadwinner and I cared for the kids. She wanted a husband she could be proud of and I wasn't cutting it.
Soon after, I would receive reports from neighbors of my Autistic daughter running down our busy street and playing in people's front yards. Once, I came by to visit and almost hit her as she was darting across the road.
I decided then, that I would fight for custody even though I was couch-surfing and unable to afford huge legal fees.
Over the next few years, I worked hard, found a lawyer who would take payments, and manged to secure a two-bedroom condo for the girls and I. I viewed the Speech and Occupational therapy appointments Clara was receiving as opportunities for parenting time. Eve and I would go to the mall and get ice cream. Their mother attempted to take them out of state and I had to spend extra money to officially remind her of the Preliminary Injunction prohibiting her from doing so.
Many opportunities came and went for a resolution, but she would not accept anything less than full custody with no Father's Rights.
As the proceedings moved on, she moved out of state leaving the children with me knowing the difficulty we've both had in finding childcare for our Special Needs daughter. A Court Appointed Advocate completed a report recognizing a marked "disconnect" between Clara and her mom.
When the trial finally came, it was done via Zoom because Mom was still out of town. Allegations were made suggesting I was an unfit father. When questioned about her decision by the judge to leave the girls in such questionable care and be absent for such a prolonged period of time, she admitted it was a tactic to persuade me to "give up".
It almost worked. My old car held on for school to end before the timing belt broke. I eventually had to quit my job because Clara's care became increasingly demanding and and I still couldn't receive the childcare assistance for which we qualified from the state.
When the judge finally handed down the Divorce Decree, I was granted primary custody and awarded Child Support. She immediately returned and began watching the girls, so I could work again. By that time, I could no longer afford to be unemployed. I had no choice. She let me use her car to take the girls to school. I was happy to be involved.
Since then, she's refused to pay any of the Child Support or Legal Fees I was awarded in the trial citing how the circumstances have changed and don't apply anymore.
This past December, I was finally able to afford a car again and told her I'd no longer need to use hers. She promptly left the country for 45 days and I once again had to stop working. I have exhausted my savings. I haven't been able to work in almost two months.
Now, she's back again, showing up to my house at odd times without calling first demanding to see her kids. I told her she's entitled to two weekends per month like the paper says. Over the past five years, my legal fees have topped 17 thousand dollars. The paper I have to show for it says she owes me about 37 thousand dollars in Child Support and reimbursement for legal fees. I have nothing left but two beautiful girls to take care of.
I could use money for Rent, Food, Special Needs Childcare, Gas to get the girls to their individual schools across town, and the legal fees that will be necessary to enforce the Divorce Decree.
Thank you for reading our story,
Clara, Eve, and Evan
