Rebuild For My Children: A Journey Of Hope

Help Me Rebuild My Life and Get Back to My Kids

I never imagined I would be writing something like this.

Asking for help has never been easy for me. I have always been someone who worked hard, figured things out, and found a way to provide for myself and my family. But right now, I am exhausted. I am discouraged. And for the first time in a very long time, I genuinely need help.

Since my release in February, I have been fighting every single day to rebuild my life from the ground up.

I walked away from an incredibly difficult chapter of my life with essentially nothing but my clothes and hygiene items—my belongings packed into trash bags. I had to start over completely.

For the last five years, I had been my own boss, working in the animal industry and building my own business from the ground up. I was proud of what I had created. I had taken all of my expertise and knowledge from 10 years of working for other people and put it into a business that would sustain life expenses however, it allowed extra time for the kids versus a regular 9 to 5 job.

It was all stolen from me. I was locked out of all accounts and had access to nothing. I’ve had no access to our marital income or our marital assets at all.

But now, trying to transition back into traditional employment has been much harder than I ever expected.

My criminal background had been completely clean for 32years. I now have a pending charge on my record, and it has made finding employment incredibly difficult.

I have applied, interviewed, and reached out to countless places. I even tried platforms like DoorDash, Amazon, and Uber, hoping they could give me a way to earn an income, and I was denied by all of them.

Many employers don’t know what to do with someone whose experience is primarily in the animal field and who has spent the last five years running their own business. I’m constantly trying to prove that I am more than what shows up on a background check.

And I am.

I have also been left trying to navigate an overwhelming amount of debt and legal expenses that accumulated during my incarceration and months thereafter due to the utilities being in my name. From January, I have had no access to the family home or any of the utilities however, I did leave them turned on due to my children living in the home. However I did not feel it was my responsibility to pay them so hence I’ve had to repay them in order to make a home for myself. Along with lawyer bills, fees, rent, utilities, food, transportation, and the countless everyday expenses that come with trying to rebuild a life from nothing.

I have worked. I have applied. I have tried to find every possible way to make money. I have continued pushing forward even on the days when getting out of bed felt impossible.

But I am reaching a point where I simply cannot keep carrying all of this alone.

The hardest part of all of this isn’t the debt.

It isn’t the job rejections.

It isn’t the legal bills.

It’s my children.

I miss my babies with my entire heart.

I know I have struggled with my mental health throughout the years, and unfortunately, things became significantly worse during my marriage. I lost myself somewhere along the way. I never fully recovered from postpartum depression, and during that period I was dealing with severe depression and medication changes while struggling to find my way back to the Mom and woman I knew I was.

Instead of feeling supported by my spouse, I often felt like my struggles were being used against me.

I spiraled.

I hit rock bottom.

But rock bottom wasn’t the end of my story.

These last several months have been about putting the pieces of myself back together—slowly, painfully, and sometimes one tiny piece at a time.

I am working on myself. I am working toward stability. I am working toward employment. I am working toward rebuilding my life and becoming the mother I know my children deserve and need.

I don’t expect anyone to fix my life for me.

I am asking for a little breathing room so that I can keep fighting.

Any money raised will go toward the immediate expenses standing between me and stability—legal fees, housing, utilities, transportation, basic necessities, and the costs associated with rebuilding my life and working toward being reunited with my children. My lawyer fees are the most pressing with only 5 days to catch up on payments as is my car insurance which is pending cancellation.

My ultimate goal isn’t simply to survive.

It’s to become stable enough to give my children the safe, loving, present, and dependable mom they deserve.

I know this is not the easiest place to ask for help. I know everyone has their own struggles and responsibilities. If you can’t donate, I completely understand. Even sharing this fundraiser, sending a message, or simply keeping me and my children in your thoughts means more to me than I can explain.

I have lost a lot.

But I haven’t lost hope. Yet.

I am still here. I am still fighting. And I am relentlessly trying to put everything back together.

I just want a chance to breathe, rebuild, and find a way to get back to my babies.

Thank you for taking the time to read my story. Thank you for believing that people can fall, struggle, and still find their way back up.

I had nothing left, so I began again.

And I am not giving up.